The sweatshop apostrophe

A character in my next Coventry novel finds herself in a La Quinta Inn off of I-10 in a western state. This weekend, in an effort to finish this novel, I’m letting life imitate art and am doing the same. Earlier this week, I received a sweet sign that Coventry needed my attention.


Someone for whom I did some work sent me this fabulous collector’s tin full of Godiva chocolates.

Lady Godiva is one of Coventry, England’s most famous residents, and as I’ve mentioned, there’s a statue of her in my Coventry, Texas. I don’t have these chocolates with me, and when I get back to The Compound, I’d better find them waiting. Word.

Anyway, I’m holed up here in my motel room. Last night I took a swim under the moon and stars, listening to the breeze in the palm trees around the pool. Then I worked. I have lots of:


…coffee (yeah, I know you coffee snobs are not impressed by the Maxwell House, but it was the only brand in the little filter packs)

and

…bottled water on ice (in the cooler that my Godiva chocolates were packed in)

and


…Crystal Light flavors, should I get bored with water.

Isn’t a writer’s life glamorous? I need to thank Really Rob for posting a photo of himself reading WHEN YOU DON’T see me, and Johnny for posting a photo of the novel on the new arrivals table at his store. People are already e-mailing comments as they read, which is always fun. Thanks to you all. =)

I have the book with me, and I read it on my breaks. I found a change someone made to something I wrote which made me a little surly, but it was no big deal. It wasn’t wrong; it just changed the way a character said something, and she wouldn’t have said it the new way.

But then…

Okay, I have a confession. I try really hard not to revert to my former professions as an English teacher or an editor when I read people’s posts. We all make mistakes, and blogs are not written for grades. But one thing that makes me COMPLETELY CRAZY is the improper use of apostrophes, most particularly in possessive pronouns. There is no apostrophe in theirs. Or hers. Or ours. NO APOSTROPHE. And if someone puts an apostrophe in “its,” that sentence better read correctly if you replace “it’s” with “it is.” That is what “it’s” ALWAYS means: IT IS. Can a dog lick it is paw? I don’t think so. Can you judge a book by it is cover? No. Online, the apostrophe has become the equivalent of a small child in a (product name redacted) factory in an emerging world country: overworked and earning nothing.

Imagine how I began to hyperventilate earlier when I found an improper apostrophe in WHEN YOU DON’T SEE ME. I think that someone at Kensington didn’t really understand the sentence and put it in there, but now it’s (it’s = it is) JUST WRONG. Hopefully, I’ll be the only one who screeched and tossed the book aside when I read the offending sentence.

Now that I’ve gotten that out of my system, I’ll get back to Coventry. Y’all have a great weekend.

27 thoughts on “The sweatshop apostrophe”

  1. for some reason i like these pictures.

    i appreciate the apostrophe lesson and understand it to an extent since spelling gets me all up in arms. (arm’s? HA)

  2. 1) Good luck with the writing this weekend.

    2) Hopefully, I’ll be the only one who screeched and tossed the book aside when I read the offending sentence.

    You know that NOW people will be seeking it out, right? LOL

    3) Have you tried the Walmart brand of Crystal Light in the cherry limeade. Aunt Nancy had some once and it was quite refreshing.

    1. I have not tried that flavor; I will at some point, thanks!

      As long as they pay for the book, people can find all the errors they want. If they steal it, however, they need to send us a check with any criticisms. 😉

      1. What book was it that you said there was some error in it that Jim caught.? Was it 3 F’s? Anyway, whichever book it was, I never did notice it, even knowing there was one.

        1. I don’t remember. There are two small errors in 3F and one HUGE error. All three are my fault. I don’t remember the small ones anymore, but the HUGE one haunts me. A similar horror almost happened in COVENTRY, but a great copy editor caught it.

          Um, there’s one error in IHTBY that was done by someone at the publisher when changes were input. There’s a seeming consistency snafu in IYM, but I see it as a disagreement between characters, not a writer’s mistake.

          I can’t remember errors in THE DEAL, HTO, SLY, or A COVENTRY CHRISTMAS. There may be some, but either I never saw them or forgot them. Which is a blessing. That shit’ll drive me crazy.

          1. I have found minor errors in each of my books after their all ready on the shelfs. Its an occupational hazard.

            –Famous Author Rob Byrnes

  3. When my family moved to TX we lived in a La Quinta for almost 3 weeks because our house wasn’t ready, but it was off 45, not I-10. I was 10, and I thought we were so cool when all my new clasamates would ask where we lived and I got to say in a hotel.

    Good luck with Coventry this weekend!

  4. I hate that your stuff got “corrected” incorrectly.

    I like that I learned didactic, a new word, to me. : )

    And I hope your TV, there, doesn’t get AMC, and that you won’t be tuning in tonight, around 8-ish.

  5. Apostrophe catasrophes. Engineers can be brilliant people, but they don’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re.” This, I suppose, is a good thing, because it means I have a job.

  6. Target makes a great strawberry lemonade in the one portion drink sticks. But now I’m going to have to go to Walmart to get the Cherry Limeade. And I’ve never been in a Walmart in my life!
    Being the worse proofreader in God’s green earth, I doubt if I notice the errors in spelling or punctuation. I auto correct as I read. But I always notice errors in continuity. And I have only thrown one book across the room in my life, and it was the first and only book the author ever wrote.
    Good writing on Coventry, and hopefully you won’t have to pull a Lady Godiva to capture the true essence of Coventry for the tale

  7. I’m half way through “Coventry Christmas” and loving every word!

    AND . . . it is (or it’s) my joy to report that there are no errant apostrophes!!

    Enjoy the Godiva stuff!!

  8. Some of those overworked apostrophes would find fulfillment at Target. Every time I walk in and see their department signs that say “Mens” and “Womens,” I cringe.

    Now, of course, I’ll be looking for that erroneous apostrophe when my copy of “When You Don’t See Me” arrives….

    Jeffrey R.

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