Lightness and darkness. Lightness and heaviness. Sometimes, I feel heaviness settle. I try to find ways to sit with it, consider it, and then let it go.
I sat outside and blew bubbles for you. Bubbles are nearly weightless. They float on air. They catch and reflect light. Their beauty is fragile and fleeting. Each bubble carries a bit of our breath with it, but the air and our bodies are quick to replenish our lungs. Inhale. Exhale.
When the heaviness and darkness come, I try to remember the lightness of you and our time together.
I tore out another reverse coloring page. I took circles from Kendra Norton’s book, and then I outlined them and as artist Andrea Nelson suggests, “rounded off the corners.”
The original from the book.I added a few strips of “light” here and there and a label from one of the bottles. The “bubbles” in the drawing are all of us, imperfect and interconnected. We bump into and absorb one another.
Theirs; today. They had thirty-eight years and three children together. She lived another twenty-three years without him. Not a single day goes by that I don’t think of their lives, their personalities, and their stories.
Happy Earth Day 2024! I have few details to provide about the creator of this art. I paid for and downloaded it digitally from the Etsy account Unlimited Extra, where it’s listed as Earth Day 2024: Everyday, Protect Environment, Save The Planet.
Every day should be Earth Day for sure. I hope you find a way to honor and provide stewardship of our beautiful planet today. I’ll shoot and add photos to this post later to show a little of Nature’s beauty at Houndstooth Hall.
Growth returning after I pruned these a few months back.
Scenes from Debby’s work around Fairy Cottage.
Some of Tim’s plants in the Hall’s front beds.
Tom always prunes the lantana after it freezes, and this one is already flourishing.
And in the other bed, this one always blooms later and is starting that now.
A peek at the tops of the mimosa and magnolia trees from the back yard.
Kinsmart die cast model of the classic 1953 Cadillac Series 62.
I actually am not writing today, or haven’t so far. I’m mostly outlining on paper, and mentally, a bunch of possible scenes and plot points that will eventually bring the Neverending Saga to a close. And when I write those words–“to a close”–my brain can’t quite conceive of it. It isn’t that I want to drag this out forever, like a nighttime TV drama where characters go through more jobs and marriages and crises in seven seasons than most people will ever experience in their entire lives. (Or, for that matter, a daytime TV drama, where characters die and return to life on a consistent basis, and sometimes they look very different, and sometimes they’ll die again and return looking like their original version. Soap operas are a delight in that way, and I say that sincerely.)
I’ll be happy when all my deserving characters are happy and doing what they should be, and then I’ll leave them alone for a while. If I rewrite the second and third 1990s novels, many of these characters appear again in supporting roles. Plus I have three strong ideas for completely unrelated novels. I have much I can write, but I’m not anywhere near saying goodbye to this group yet.
I do reflect a lot on what I changed from the 1990s versions, and I’m happy with those choices. I provided backstories where there were none. I changed or let go of certain storylines that I never thought I would, but doing so opened up so many better possibilities. There were people who read those 1990s books and said they loved them, and I have no way of knowing if they would love these.
If I were to tell you some of the ways these seven manuscripts I’ve poured my time and heart and effort into for the last seven years have been a means for a few people to criticize, belittle, or disrespect me, you might wonder why I keep going. It’s okay. The books and I are still standing. The people who respect what I do or who love me are still supportive in a range of ways. The others are either no longer a part of my life or if they are, I mostly stopped talking about writing with them (sort of the way most of us avoided talking about politics, religion, or our problematic relatives before it became a thing to share all that over social media–with words and videos–and now we can’t avoid it by moving to the other side of the globe because our phones will deliver it all to us 24/365. My detractors are safe from this rambling commentary since they also don’t read this blog.).
I had a lovely period of time once when things I wrote were published. Maybe I’ll get to experience that again. Maybe not. Publishing didn’t bring me riches or acclaim or the security that I’d always have a writing career. It brought me happiness, a sense of fulfillment, and the understanding that I’m able to follow through and finish things.
Some day, I hope you’ll come along for the ride with the Neverending Saga.
I guess Tiny Tuesday is a good occasion to offer a decent goodbye to this pencil that’s becoming too short for me to scribble notes to myself without discomfort (arthritis in my fingers). So long, Peewee, and thanks for your service. Notice I’m replacing you with another of your kind because you Ticonderoga Noir No. 2 Pencils are the BEST.
It’s bizarre to think I did the No. 1 post in this Thursday series in January 2022, scattered them up to September of that year, then did no. 24 in March of 2023. It seems like so long ago! Some new decks have come to me since then, most recently a fascinating deck from Jim: Cheryl Kelleher Walsh’s Aqua Summersus Underwater Tarot. Above are bits of the Major Arcana cards to give you a sense of how beautiful the photography is. Yes, those are photos, not paintings!
Walsh shoots her portrait models underwater, and in 2019, she decided to create a Tarot deck using the same technique. The models she discussed the concept with were eager to claim which cards they wanted to represent, and they then created their own costumes, along with designers and a headpiece maker. They did all of this while dealing with pandemic precautions in 2020, including safe distancing, masking, and each model bringing their own safety person.
The results have an ethereal beauty that dazzles me, and I also like many of the things Walsh says about the project, including her explanation of how she uses the deck, which aligns with my sense that Tarot is a good tool for self-reflection and examination:
Walsh: I constantly strive to better myself as a person and an artist. While I deeply respect Tarot card readers and their unique abilities, I am not a Tarot card reader myself and recognize that connecting with the cards is a personal experience that varies from individual to individual. As the creator of this Tarot deck, I poured my creative energy and positive intentions into it, but I understand that it is ultimately up to each user to find their own connection.
…..
For me, Tarot cards serve as prompts that inspire me to explore different aspects of my life and journey. They encourage me to delve deeper into areas that I may have overlooked or not considered fully, ultimately leading me to personal growth and self-improvement.
I look forward to getting to know this deck. Thanks, Jim!
Just a wee 4×6-inch canvas, painted in acrylics in 2007. I was looking to see if I’d ever done a painting in the One Word Art series with a particular title, and I haven’t. But in looking at all my photos of old paintings, I see a lot that became part of other works and then disappeared into the unknown. I hope some of them found homes where they were wanted.
Every time we share any part of ourselves, whether it’s been channeled into visual arts, words, performing arts, confidences to people we trust, we take a risk. Sometimes we find affirmation. Sometimes we don’t.
However you present yourself–your feelings, your thoughts, your creativity, your dreams–it takes courage. Never let anyone tell you otherwise. People who make you feel small or weak are not your people.
