Imagine that it takes you–you, who do not have dial-up, but pay a monthly fortune for high-speed Internet access–about an hour to get online. That you read your e-mail. That you suddenly realize you’re offline when you try to respond to an e-mail. That you wait about half an hour, get online again, answer that e-mail and another one or two, then pull up LiveJournal. That you read comments to your posts. That you begin reading your friends’ posts. That you compose a comment, but when you hit send, you’re no longer online. You wait ten to fifteen minutes. Get back on LJ. Post that comment. Read another post. Try to answer. Guess what?
Repeat this several times a day. Add to it that you go offline every time you’re trying to research something for what you’re writing, every time you try to read the news, look at a Google map, fact check something, follow a link from someone’s post, read a friend’s blog, upload a photo, download a document…
Imagine that this goes on every day for twenty-two days. That you’ve reported trouble with your cable modem numerous times. That you’ve replaced your modem. Replaced your wireless router. Dealt with crating the dogs so the cable guys can come in and out of your house. Found that it’s never fixed after they leave. Closed the gate so Rex can’t escape because no one understands that the SAME GATE THAT HAD TO BE OPENED WHEN YOU GOT HERE HAS TO BE CLOSED WHEN YOU LEAVE.
Called the cable company again, knowing that each call is an investment of at least 15 minutes just to get a live voice on the line. Realized that even though the live voice will be polite and helpful, you will be a raging bitch because YOU’RE JUST SO TIRED OF THIS.
While it’s going on, AT&T calls you almost daily and tries to seduce you into switching to their DSL plan. But you realize that the phone lines into your house are old old old, often have static, and your phone has a tendency to stop working. Do you really want to make that change? Will AT&T really be any better than Time Warner Roadrunner Comcast or whoever they are today?
When you call the cable company–AGAIN–to ask them that question, they give you a full month’s credit on your “high speed Internet access” (ha!) and modem rental. And you’d like to be grateful, but all you really want is to be able to be online for more than a few minutes at a time without drama.
Try to work on two novels when you’re this frustrated. Let me know how that works out for you.
That truly sucks!!
Ya know, “Steve” in Bangalor is doing his best to help you. You could be a bit more grateful.
I’ve always hated dealing with “middlemen” on the phone. They never get the issue right and always try to pigeonhole it into an issue that’s in their handy book. I find that alcohol and deep breaths help.
And yeah…sentence #1 is dripping in sarcasm.
What I find interesting is when I tried to initially post a comment on here, I was kicked off line.
After being on dialup from October 05 to December 06 after the storm/flood, I can sympathize.
What I find interesting is when I tried to initially post a comment on here, I was kicked off line.
It’s contagious! Save yourself!
The RubinSmo Manor high speed wireless connection is available to you any time you need it… as are our softball bats if you like to beat a certain cable company employee…
The sad thing is, all the cable employees have been SO NICE. It’s not fair. I want to vent at them, and they’re all friendly and helpful and bewildered about the problem. So I think the best thing is for me to just blame the Evil New Townhouse People. They’ve done something that’s interfering with the cable. That’s it!
In which case… let’s go write nasty things on their lawn with weed killer!
It is assuredly the most mature thing we could do to make you feel better about the situation. 😉
Have you figured out what you’re doing wrong yet?
–Famous Author Rob Byrnes
As God is my witness, it is NOT operator error. The only thing I’m doing wrong is abstaining from alcohol. That may come to a debauched end soon.
(Is “debauched” a word?)
Ah, definitely your first mistake. Could be worse. You could be dealing with AOL. That would require alcohol and harder drugs.
Is “debauched” a word?
Yes, as in “David debauched his good name yet again when he drank his own weight in cosmos at this year’s Pride.”
Not that that really happened, mind you.
Ah, see, I only made it an adjective. It took you with your wild ways to turn it into a verb.
Don’t hate me because I’m giggling.
You’re such a clown. 😉
I think you know the tune
I knew a clown Mo Bangles
And he’d kill for you
In big ass shoes
Mister Mo Bangles
Call him Mister Mo Bangles
Mister Mo Bangles come back and dance please
Re: I think you know the tune
You’re not well, you know.
Jesus,Mary and Joseph!
Maybe I should send you some of my meds to help, or at least offer to carry your semi-automatic up a tower somewhere.
I would be so beyond frustrated!
Scream and vent, vent and Scream my dear!
I think Tom and Tim have hidden the Glock. So mean…
Of course, the freaking cable has pretty much stayed connected all night, and will be chugging away like gangbusters when the tech is here tomorrow. Five minutes after he pulls away? A faint giggling sound from the modem just before the lights go dark on it.
I’m not well? I know right where my Glock is… no one has hidden it? Who is having stabilityu issues? Not I, McFly!
Been there, done that in a post several weeks ago, but were you talking to someone in Mumbai who you totally couldn’t understand. My problem was caused by a cable rustler who had illegally and incorrectly tapped into the cable line. Or so I was told. How old are the cable lines, by the way?
I think the cable lines were put in when Elizabeth Taylor was an ingenue. Today the cable guy came again and said the signal is TOO STRONG at the line. Another lineman will arrive today or tomorrow to adjust…
lineman… is Glen Campbell going to try to help you with your modem?
or will it be the “telephone man”?
Sorry – i just fininshed reading the JD Souther stuff so my mind is on music right now – apparently BAD music
*ouch*