An Editor’s Wet (D)ream

You’d think editors would have work forever considering the abundance of errors in anything you read. However, we get no respect.

In reading copy about Tim’s and my next novel, which will be published under the name “Cochrane Lambert” (at any time over the past six months, I could have ranted about the name “Cochrane Lambert” but I’ve restrained myself), I came across this jewel:

Cochrane Lambert is the writing ream of Becky Cochrane and Timothy Lambert, authors of The Deal, and (under the name Timothy James Beck) It Had To Be You, He’s the One, and I’m Your Man.

The writing REAM? What the hell is that? AND WHY CAN NO ONE REMEMBER THAT IT IS TIMOTHY J.–J.J.J.J.dammit!!–LAMBERT?

Tim, it’s nice to be on the same ream with you. We’ve got ream spirit! Let’s win one for the ream!

Or something.

13 thoughts on “An Editor’s Wet (D)ream”

  1. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH! *pant, pant, deep breath*
    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! *glaring at screen* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!

    1. If you’d just use the name T.J. — which I created especially for you — you wouldn’t have these problems. Just sayin’…

  2. Perhaps they think “J” makes him sound fictional. “J” appears to be the middle initial of choice for all cartoon characters. For example, we have Homer J. Simpson, Bullwinkle J. Moose, and Stimpson J. Cat. Change the middle initial to “F,” as in “My name is Timothy Fucking Lambert.” It’ll never be omitted again.

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