My Life as a Motel Bandit

Tim has talked about the dog drama that has taken place at The Compound during the big visit from Mark G. Harris and Lisa (Currently Not) in Iowa. But there’s HUMAN drama, too. It all began when Mark got here on Tuesday night and found THIS in the guest suite of the west wing:

Why should he complain about having a set of towels, washcloths, and guest soaps and shampoo (snagged from LaQuinta) nicely presented in the guest suite? Well, because Mark isn’t staying there. Mark is staying in what he APPARENTLY thinks is the guest hovel of the TimLair. I did this little presentation as a welcoming gesture for Lisa, whereas Tim told Mark he should be grateful he put sheets on the bed. (Mr. Herren will understand that comment.)

To try to placate him, I presented Mark his post-flight, stomach-settling Alka Seltzer (Plus!) in this:

Apparently that soothed him enough so that the following day, he went on a walk with Lisa for a bit of grocery shopping and returned with, among other things, these:

Stunning…much like Mark G. Harris and Lisa.

Later, Lindsey came over to eat dinner with us all. We’d received a box from David “Siskel and Ebert and Roeper” Puterbaugh that we were forbidden to open until we were all together. JOY! JOYNESS! Not Candy Mountain, but Candy Wine Bucket!


Rex watches Lisa, Tim, and Mark as they express happiness over the best movie-watching snacks ever, including:

Twizzlers, Jelly Bellys, Junior Mints, Raisinets, Milk Duds, and buttery Movie Time popcorn. We munched on all that on Thursday night while watching one of my favorite movies ever, Moonstruck. David, we love you awful! Thanks so much for your incredibly sweet gesture, especially since you’ve been surviving off Cinnabons for over a week waiting for someone to pick you up at Intercontinental Airport.

Rex, however, does not thank you, as he had some kind of weird fit trying to get this part of your gift off his head while Lindsey and Sugar scoffed at him:

My only regret is that this photo of a hot biker chick named Rhonda sitting with Mark, Sugar, Lindsey, Tom, and Rex in Mark’s guest hovel is so dark. I need to steal some lamps from Days Inn.

28 thoughts on “My Life as a Motel Bandit”

    1. Isn’t that it’s natural state?

      I am so ragingly jealous right now. Ragingly. Like, fist shaking in the air, would have gotten away with it if not for you kids, Khan! Khan! jealous.

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          1. then perhaps you should see it before passing judgement … it is Kurt Russell’s second best movie… the first of course is Escape From New York. BTILC is hee-freaking-larious.

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                    1. Humor does have a home at The Compound. You don’t like Julia Roberts movies. I don’t like Big Trouble in Little China. However, I totally defend YOUR right to like it.

                    3. You should make that work for you. (Was it Mark who said you sounded like Truman Capote instead of Demi Moore? And you think *I* insult you?)

  2. Actually I had a falling out with the cashiers at Cinnabon midweek; I’ve been hanging with the baristas at Starbucks since Wednesday. But I can tell my welcome is starting to wear thin here as well. I’m sorry, but after 47 grande lattes is it too much to expect a free one every now and then?

    Glad to see the snacks arrived and were enjoyed. I bet Lisa’s enjoying that cozy looking bed too. It’s a helluva lot cozier looking than these airport chairs I’ve been sleeping on. Well, not really sleeping. Did I mention that a few (alright, most) of the 47 grande lattes were double shots?

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    2. (I think Mark has the cozier bed, but he likes to pretend he’s being mistreated. And we just keep Lisa up so late that she’s too tired to realize her bed isn’t as comfortable.)

      Reply

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