…whether or not to share what I think.
…whether or not to share what I believe.
…to understand that I hold contradictory viewpoints.
…to understand that I don’t fit neatly into anyone’s categories.
…to know that perception is NOT reality.
…to apologize when I know it’s warranted.
…not to apologize insincerely.
…when to participate in a conversation and when not to.
…to believe that actions have consequences.
…to do what I believe is right.
…to evaluate risks before I act or speak.
…to believe that most people are good humans.
…to believe in redemption.
…to understand that we are all flawed.
…to freely say I am wrong when I realize I am.
…to listen with an open mind even if I don’t appear to hear.
…to form opinions of what I see and hear.
…to listen without being compelled to respond.
…to know when someone is trying to manipulate, goad, or push me and keep that knowledge to myself.
…to resist being manipulated, goaded, and pushed.
…to know when I am being lied to and whether or not to say I know.
…to withdraw trust from people who lie to me.
…to practice self-restraint.
…to let go of anything that does not serve my better self.
…to laugh.
…to cry.
…to be who I am.
…to believe myself about who I am instead of someone else’s opinion of who I am.
…to resist the influence of any other human, organization, or institution to define what I believe is wrong as right.
…diplomacy over aggression.
…forgiveness over revenge.
…creation over destruction.
…compassion over cruelty.
…solutions over cynicism.
This is a love song, but expresses something I’m feeling.
ETA: As a point of reference as to what prompted this post, an almost ten-minute video and an in-depth article in The New Yorker. Powerful. Enlightening. Will be ignored by those most in need of them, leaving me with feelings that I counteract by reaffirming to myself that I remain who I know I am.
So many thoughts on this one, mainly the song. I was listening to my Troy playlist and You Don’t Know Me features heavily. I think I have 15 versions of it Bette Midler, this one, Ray solo, Elvis, Willie Nelson, BB King, Lisa Loeb, Susie Arioli, Jann Arden, Eddie Money, Vic Damone, Norah Jones, Patty Page … that is how much I love this song. Next to He Stopped Loving Her Today, I think it is the saddest song, and one of the most beautiful songs ever written. Cindy Walker wrote it and Willie Nelson did an album covering them. So so so so good. You’ve put me in a musical state with this one, although maybe not the intentio but good all the same and I like your words.
I love Meryl Streep singing this in Postcards From the Edge and almost used that one.
One thing I used to say as a counsellor (and still do) is that my perception is my reality. This could be a problem if I was a Trump supporter.
I remember the first time I heard this phrase used, but in a slightly different way: Perception is reality. I immediately rejected it. The situation is too detailed to get into, but I was forced by a manager to apologize to a coworker for something I DID NOT DO because the coworker perceived that I did it.
However, I am not a liar. I couldn’t apologize for something that wasn’t true or real. So I had to issue a non-apology apology, which is something I am loathe to do in general. A sort of “I’m very sorry you thought (the thing she thought). Though I didn’t do that or even intend it, I regret that you were upset.”
She then told the manager I admitted it and apologized for it. Which I didn’t do. So everyone was satisfied that I was properly disciplined–FOR NOTHING.
I absolutely can’t stand the phrase. If I perceive the world is flat, the world still is not flat. I’m just being stubborn or a dumbass, and I don’t think mapmakers need to accommodate me.