The post with nudity!


Wagon O’ Dogs. Margot, Sparky, Rex, Guinness, and Minute

On the Saturday of Memorial Day weekend, Lynne came over and worked herself, Tom, and Tim to exhaustion on The Compound grounds. In addition to photographing dogs in Lynne’s gardening wagon (which I like so much that I put it in A COVENTRY WEDDING), I baked a couple of cakes that Lynne needed to decorate for some graduates, visited my mother, and dashed into Michael’s for paper to cover Lynne’s cake boards. (In other words, I shirked anything that would make me get dirty, sweat, or strain my back.)

Whenever I’m in the Wilton cake decorating section, I can’t resist looking at cake pans. This time, I spotted one that I knew I had to have for Edward Ladybughands. This is what the cake looked like after I finished it.

I discovered that one reason Lynne’s cake decorating process seems to be much less stressful than mine is because when I’m with her, she has a Cake Bitch: me. I’m always washing bowls and tips and handing over things she needs with the precision and efficiency of a surgical nurse. I can mix frosting colors and find tips. I’ve even been known to properly roll up a pastry bag (rare, but it has happened). I also make sure she always has a glass of ice water at hand so she won’t get dehydrated.

Of course, even without my assistance, Lynne is a masterful cake decorator. I, on the other hand, took something like twenty-seven hours to decorate this ladybug, even though it’s a really simple cake. Whatever. This left Tom to do everything else. When I’d asked Tim what he wanted for his birthday dinner, he mentioned that he hadn’t eaten a good hamburger in forever. (I think he’s not eating them from restaurants these days; I’m not sure.)

So Tom bought the groceries, dragged out the grill (I did start the fire–this is a skill of mine, either in a grill or a fireplace–Beavis isn’t one of the voices in my head for nothing), cooked the burgers and dogs (and even three steaks for another meal this week), sliced up the stuff for the burgers, and got the table ready. Yay, Tom!

The clean-shaven birthday boy arrived.

Just as we were finishing our meal, Tim’s parents called to wish him a happy birthday. Meanwhile, Margot and I had a discussion about whether or not it’s okay to use iambic pentameter in emo poetry.

Or maybe I was just convincing her that all that stuff on the table had nothing to do with her. Because I tend not to wave the forbidden under the noses of dogs like SOME people I could name. Or photograph.


Tim and Rex.


Tom and Sugar.

We didn’t cut the cake until The Brides arrived with Sugar to sing happy birthday and watch Tim open presents and…blow.

I asked everyone to either reenact last year’s pose from Tim’s birthday or do something else so I could get a group shot. Which is when Lindsey decided to:

She then sweetly licked the frosting from Tim’s nose.

It could have ended there, but when everyone was distracted, Tim managed to accomplish:

Which provoked a race of people and dogs around the house. Lindsey finally caught Tim in the hall.

And transformed herself into a frosting vampire and Tim into her victim.

We now know what it takes to get undressed with Timothy J. Lambert:

After clean-up, wardrobe was called in. Lindsey ended up swallowed by Tom’s old Rolling Stones T-shirt. Everyone seemed ready to behave, although Tim’s expression made me think his T-shirt was meant to convey this message.

And then his loyal companion Rex moved in to take one last lick.

35 thoughts on “The post with nudity!”

  1. My favorite Lillian quote “Smoking gave me the energy I needed to write plays and invent mayonnaise.”

    I think I speak for everyone when I say Timothy worked for the NYC Police Department? Well that DOES explain his love of various restraining devices…

                1. Oh, and for the record, I have never wanted to see anyone in my little LiveJournal circle naked. I may crack “cheese” and “restraint” jokes, but as far as I’m concerned everyone I know on LJ have no naughty bits — because to consider otherwise creeps me out.

  2. first, i love the gardening wagon. i need to get me one of those.

    next, how fun was that b-day!! cute cake, cute people, cute dogs! that’s the way to spend your b-day, indeed!

  3. Does Tim get the blue hair from his mother or father’s side? Or is it just all folks from Maine?

    It truly does look like a splendid time. All those smiles with happiness behind them. Wonderful.

  4. Looks like all kinds of good food and good fun.
    (In the bathroom picture–is Tim looking to make sure there’s no Timcam like he has in his place?)

    1. I was looking for a towel, before I realized that I was in Becky’s house, not my apartment, and the towels were on the towel rack where they’re supposed to be and not slung over the shower rod.

  5. Imaginary thought bubbles for dog picture

    From Left to Right…
    “I’m shy and neglected”, “I’m drunk and not really paying attention”, “mmm…fingers” (top), “I could kill you with a thought” (bottom), and “where’s my face?”

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