Just breathe

There has been street flooding in Houston courtesy of Tropical Storm Beta. So far for us, that’s meant a very soggy yard and unhappy dogs. But no flooding. Always grateful for no flooding. Also grateful for the two days first responders took care of everyone. Beta should be finished with us now.

I can’t blame the weather for the uptick in my anxiety level. That’s political. The worst part is when I can’t sleep, because then my mind goes to its darkest, saddest places. I’ve been working on that by making a definite cutoff point to writing each night; ignoring/disconnecting all devices; and since my mind can’t focus well enough to read (which in good times is my greatest wind-down activity), I’ve been doing a lot of coloring. When coloring, I seem better able to know when I need to shift my thoughts from the things that upset me about the world, my life, and my relationships, and think of the things that make me happy about those same things. Whatever works. Also, I’ve gone back to this. So far, it’s worked two nights, failed one.

One thing I haven’t talked about is that September is Suicide Awareness Month. Last year in April, I did a post about our nephew Aaron along with some drawings of eggs my mother-in-law sent at Easter. I mentioned then that eggs are a symbol of the circle of life as well as new life and potential. I colored one of the eggs last year for Aaron. By now, I’ve finished all of them.

National Hopeline Network: 1-800-442-HOPE (4673)
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
National Youth Crisis Hotline: Text RISE to 741741 in the United States

I may be posting more coloring pages I’ve done among other things. Be patient with me for all the things I can’t say. Won’t say. I have to mute my rage setting for now. For the friends who are balm to my soul, thank you. There is a season for everything inside me. And all of us. I love the Byrds and I love this old song. (In fact, next book, there’s a fun little tribute to the Byrds in a non-musical way.) Nice images in this video. Noticed they misspelled “weep” because I can’t turn off my inner editor.

Peace.