Tiny Tuesday!

If you follow me on Instagram, excuse me for repeating myself. There’s a reason.

Recently I began getting emails from Barnes & Noble about my Nook eReader. I just looked back through my blog and discovered we’ve been together for eight years. As B&N told me, they are no longer going to service and update this first generation Nook. They offered me a big discount to get a new eReader, and I chose a Nook GlowLight. It was delivered a few days ago, I powered it on, and my B&N library is at my fingertips. My Kobo library–the books I’ve purchased from Murder By The Book through Kobo–are saved on my old Mac. At some point, I need to move those onto this new device.

I needed to get out tonight after a long day of work, so I decided to visit Barnes & Noble in my old ‘hood and look for a cover for the new Nook. When I saw this one, as I said on Instagram, “It’s like the artist knows me.”

The dog, the book titles, the rainbow, the elephant and lion on the shelf. I needed to come home and research the artist whose name was on the inside of the cover, which I couldn’t read in subdued lighting.

I detoured to Tim’s where I grappled in conversation with some of the things that make me feel like I’m going crazy. They are not things in my personal life or my work life. They are things going on in the world, and they are causing me mental, emotional, and physical suffering.

Then I came home, sat at my computer, and found the artist. Her name is Anne Bentley, and I went to her website and looked through her gallery, and every painting was like finding a new friend. Then I noticed that great little icon that meant she has an Instagram account, so I updated my Instagram post and provided her name and the name of her Instagram account and expressed my joy at finding more of her work.

And she commented her thanks! But it’s Anne Bentley who needs to be thanked. I’m going to share verbatim the text I sent Tim.

The artist of my Nook cover just posted a comment on my Instagram. I am thrilled. And her art has made what’s wrong click. We are creative. We cope and comment and react through what we create. I am not creating. I am not finding the outlet for my voice that I need in horrible times. I don’t have time to write novels. I have to find a way to create that speaks my hurt and frustration. I’m watching people destroy and mock my most profoundly held ideals. And I can’t just not care or not react. It makes the pain inside too powerful. And then pain is like a disease eating away at your very soul. It can kill you in the end.

Everything I just said to you is going on my blog. A step toward honest self-expression.

I’m not sure how my creativity will manifest itself. I only know that it has to. I’m so grateful for the writers and painters and poets and songwriters and performers and photographers who nourish my soul. It’s my time to join them at the feast.

A not so tiny Tuesday when a little Nook cover from a very big artist provides me an epiphany.