Across town, I am being underestimated

When Tom and I got married, Lynne, who’s been my friend since I was 12, made our wedding cake. Layer after layer, creating roses after roses from frosting… She was delirious by W-day.

A cousin of mine came to the wedding with her husband and left a gift on the gift table.

I’m not one to disparage gifts, and the real gift was my cousin’s presence. But later that night, Tom and I opened some of our gifts at our apartment with only Lynne, her son, and her aunt there, before we all went to party with the rest of the out-of-towners. Delirious Lynne became hysterical over my cousin’s gift. It was obviously a last-minute thing: We must not arrive at the wedding empty handed! So I received a set of plastic lime-slice coasters, and Lynne could not stop laughing at them.

The next year, Lynne and her husband were packing their camper for a trip. “Oh! I have a great idea,” I said. “Since my apartment has nowhere to cook out or sit outside, YOU should take these coasters and keep them in the camper! That way, we can ALL enjoy them.” Lynne seemed oddly willing to take the coasters…

That Christmas, as I greedily tore into my presents from Lynne, I picked up what I thought was another ornament, beautifully wrapped. And there they were: the coasters. “This is war,” I vowed.

For seventeen years, those coasters have gone back and forth between us. One year, I gave Lynne a stuffed wolf. If you unzipped the wolf’s stomach, there were a couple of stuffed wolf pups inside. And the coasters. Another year, Lynne baked Tom a birthday cake. When I bit down into my piece, my teeth touched plastic. After baking the cake, Lynne had slid the coasters inside the layer before frosting it. Every birthday, anniversary, or Christmas, those coasters are likely to turn up in a creative way. My cousin has since died, but she’s part of all our gift-giving celebrations, while many other wedding gifts and guests are a distant memory.

Lynne’s son is grown now. The Christmas he got engaged, I wanted to give his fiancee a proper welcome into the family. I gave her the coasters. I haven’t seen them since; she and her mother-in-law have been exchanging them. I KNOW this Christmas it has to be my turn. I’m sure those two are giggling and scheming about how to give them to me.

Little do they know… This year, I have a gift basket ready for the daughter-in-law. I found candles that are lemon and lime slices. I found SPONGES with lime slices on them. And I found a set of lemon-slice COASTERS to give her. Just when my old friend is feeling safe and reveling in her daughter-in-law’s dismay, I’ll give one last gift to Lynne: a set of watermelon-slice coasters.

Whether or not it’s more blessed to give than to receive, it’s definitely more fun.

7 thoughts on “Across town, I am being underestimated”

    1. I would laugh at your pun, but now that I know you’re being shunned by half the state of Florida… Would the FBI start tapping my phone? HA!, FBI, I almost never talk on the phone. So there.

  1. This was so much fun to read that I got my husband in here to share the story. You are so funny. Lynne is lucky to have shared so much of her life with you. The creativity is just charming. Thank you for making me smile.

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